Just. Wow. On to the news.
STORY OF THE WEEK (long read)
What: Trump Got COVID
Why: Because during a week that felt like a decade, Trump went and caught himself a disease that isn’t that serious according to him and his followers, even though he is currently (? [I seriously have no idea he is alive or dead because everything from the announcement to health updates to parading his contagious, disease ridden body around the hospital have been steeped in lies and misdirection]) receiving emergency treatment meant for severe cases at Walter Reed. Somehow Trump telling a bunch of racists to “stand by” during the debates, his taxes finally coming out in public, a massive attack on voting from Federal and State Conservatives, and the Azerbaijani / Armenian proxy war that is going on are suddenly too small of news, because this fucker has been playing with fire for the past year, and finally dropped the match in lighter fluid. I hate this year.
ECONOMIC THING OF THE WEEK (long read)
What: Trump’s Taxes
Why: Because he is either broke, committing fraud, or some combination of both.
LAW THING OF THE WEEK (long read)
What: The Anti RBG
Why: Because someone described Amy Barrett’s nomination as the equivalent of Ginsburg having built a sold well trod road, and then Barrett comes along and destroys the path behind her. Also, a whole bunch of people got COVID at her nomination day because Conservatives hate science, and failed to practice basic safety measures.
SCIENCE THING OF THE WEEK (long look)
What: COVID Is Real
Why: Because we are up to as many cases as we had back in the beginning fucking July. Because we aren’t wearing masks. Because we aren’t practicing social distancing. Because we’re not utilizing basic hygiene. Given, it is already way too late to stop it, because Americans are selfish assholes who cannot be minimally inconvenienced to save people’s lives, but maybe, just maybe use that selfishness to protect yourself an your loved ones.
SPORTS THING OF THE WEEK (3 min. read)
What: Football Is Falling Apart
Why: Because unlike the NBA, the NFL decided to say fuck it, we don’t care about anyone. Multiple games have been postponed due to team outbreaks.
MOVIE THING OF THE WEEK (3 min. read)
What: Tenet Is Here, But Don’t See It
Why: Because watching a movie in a theater is not worth risking your life for.
MUSIC THING OF THE WEEK (4 min. read)
What: Fleet Foxes Get Happy
Why: Because leave it to Robin to write the happiest songs of his career during one of the darkest moments. Or, if you want to stick with darker indie, Sufjan Stevens just released an album too. Or, if you want nothing to do with the modern era, go revisit any one of these albums.
PHOTOGRAPHY THING OF THE WEEK (3 min. read)
What: STAY THE FUCK INSIDE
Why: Because this glorious asshole just exposed his protection to COVID to pretend he’s not sick.
LITERATURE THING OF THE WEEK (2 min. read)
What: Solutions And Other Problems
Why: Because Allie Brosh, former participant of the good Internet of the 2010s, just released her second book.
VIDEO GAME THING OF THE WEEK (short look)
What: Microsoft Vs. Sony, Chapter 4
Why: Because the next generation of game consoles are just around the corner. Trying to buy them was a mess. Welcome to your digital future.
INTERNET THINGS OF THE WEEK (∞)
What: Olde Time Mac And Cheese; Vote; The NY Times Op-Ed We Deserve
Why: Because Internet.
THING YOU SHOULD GET BRIAN OF THE WEEK
What: You know what, nothing. That’s right universe, I am good. I have absolutely everything I need. Everything is just fine, so, you can stop asking. I mean, it’s not like for the past few months I’ve been asking for a reprieve from insanity, but somehow things keep on getting exponentially moreso, or something. Nope. Nothing needed here. Just carry on your merry way.
Why: Because Brian deserves it.
Managing Editor, Webtacular World
The Internet You Didn’t Know You Needed™