LET’S GO GIANTS! On to the news.

STORY OF THE WEEK (3 min. read)
What: Apparently Still Ebola (Sigh)
Why: Or, according to emails of readers of the NY Times, Eating Late At Night Is Dangerous. Quick note from the Journal of Advanced Practice Nursing – More Americans Have Been Married To Kim Kardashian Than Have Died from Ebola. Or, for those of you who only respond to serious considerations:

ECONOMIC THING OF THE WEEK (8 min. read)
What: Sneaker Heads And Economics
Why: Because shoes shouldn’t cost that much.

LAW THING OF THE WEEK (5.5 min. watch)
What: Dog Court
Why: Because the Supreme Court is so much better with animals.

SCIENCE THING OF THE WEEK (2 min. read, 1.5 min. watch)
What: Suck It, Felix!
Why: Because that has to be the only thought Googler Alan Eustace had when he decided to become the new record holder for highest skydive, since for some reason only being Google’s Senior Vice President of Knowledge (yes, really) apparently isn’t good enough.

SPORTS THING OF THE WEEK (4 min. read)
What: MAS GIGANTES
Why: Because October.

TV THING OF THE WEEK (277 + hour watch)
What: Every. Simpsons. Ever.
Why: Because it is the worst. show. ever. now available whenever you want.

MUSIC THING OF THE WEEK (2 min. read)
What: Bridge School Benefit
Why: Because this is one of my favorite concerts of the year for a wonderful cause.

PERFORMANCE THING OF THE WEEK (3 min. watch)
What:Actual Cannibal Shia LaBeouf
Why: Because he actually wasn’t that bad in Fury.

LITERATURE THING OF THE WEEK (4 min. read)
What: How To Survive In The Amazon
Why: Because writing books is hard.

INTERNET THINGS OF THE WEEK (∞)
What: You Guys! Marcel’s Back!; Getting Old Sucks; Reading Fucking Rainbow
Why: Because Internet.

THING YOU SHOULD GET BRIAN OF THE WEEK
What: Tickets Please
Why: Because Brian deserves it.

Webtacularly yours,
Brian
Managing Editor, Webtacular World
The Internet You Didn’t Know You Needed™

GIANTS ARE IN THE WORLD SERIES!!!! On to the news.

STORY OF THE WEEK (too many min. read/watch/listen)
What: EBOLA IS COMING FOR YOU!
Why: Because it actually isn’t.

LAW THING OF THE WEEK (4 min. read)
What: The Destruction Of Voter ID Laws
Why: Because ID laws ruin the idea of democracy, even if the US is technically a Democratic Republic.

SPORTS THING OF THE WEEK (3 min. read)
What: WORLD SERIES BABY!
Why: Because it’s October.

TV THING OF THE WEEK (20 min. read)
What: The Dana Carvey Show, In Memoriam
Why: Because Dana Carvey understood the future of comedy 20 years before it happened.

FOOD THING OF THE WEEK (7 min. watch)
What: The Most Refined Palates Dine On The Most Refined Meal
Why: Because now you know why you have two knives.

DRINK THING OF THE WEEK (7 min. watch)
What: When Shaken, Not Stirred, Is Wrong
Why: Because now you get to call out that bartender in the suspenders and the handlebar mustache for making your drink wrong.

MOVIE THING OF THE WEEK (3 min. watch)
What: How To Portray Power In Film
Why: Because Chianti probably goes better with other foods

MUSIC THING OF THE WEEK (3 min. read)
What: The History Of Def Jam
Why: Because Def Jam has been the forefront hitmaker for decades at this point, and the label deserves to be celebrated.

COMEDY THING OF THE WEEK (37 min. listen)
What: How To Pretend To Be A Blowhard
Why: Because the amount of effort that goes into making you laugh about depressing things is actually way more than you probably thought.

VIDEO GAME THING OF THE WEEK (10 min. read)
What: Against. Gamer. Gate.
Why: Because even though #gamergate allegedly started as a stand against corruption within games journalism, what it has turned into is a misogynistic affront against anyone who enjoys video games.

INTERNET THINGS OF THE WEEK (∞)
What: The Longest Flight; They Should Be Called The Julyists; This Is Bread
Why: Because Internet.

THING YOU SHOULD GET BRIAN OF THE WEEK
What: Coffee On The Go
Why: Because Brian deserves it.

Webtacularly yours,
Brian
Managing Editor, Webtacular World
The Internet You Didn’t Know You Needed™

Congrats to Webtaculators Lior and Sarah! And with that, wedding season for 2014 is done. On to the news.

STORY OF THE WEEK (4 min. read)
What: Speaking Of Weddings…
Why: Because now more than 50% of the United States allows gay marriage.

ECONOMIC THING OF THE WEEK (5 min. read)
What: How You Should Spend Your Money
Why: Because experiences are way better than trinkets.

SCIENCE THING OF THE WEEK (2 min. read)
What: What Ebola Isn’t
Why: Because Ebola isn’t going to kill you.

SPORTS THING OF THE WEEK ()
What: Giants In October
Why: Because GO GIANTS!

FOOD THING OF THE WEEK (7 min. look)
What: What’s For Breakfast?
Why: Because nothing beats eggs, potatoes, and bacon, in my book.

MUSIC THING OF THE WEEK (3 min. watch)
What: God Only Knows
Why: Because my favorite version of this song is actually from a video game.

LITERATURE THING OF THE WEEK (5 min. read)
What: Overthinking The Giving Tree
Why: Because your favorite childhood story has awful implications. Also, the only z animal is a zebra.

LAUNDRY THING OF THE WEEK (∞)
What: Get Rid Of That Stain
Why: Because now you can.

GAME THING OF THE WEEK (10 min. read)
What: Gaming The Game
Why: Because I could totally use a glitched video poker windfall right now.

INTERNET THINGS OF THE WEEK (∞)
What: The Next Big Thing; The Carlton Returns; Honk!; Armor Is Pretty Good At Its Job
Why: Because Internet.

THING YOU SHOULD GET BRIAN OF THE WEEK
What: BMW i8
Why: Because Brian deserves it.

Webtacularly yours,
Brian
Managing Editor, Webtacular World
The Internet You Didn’t Know You Needed™

Hope everyone has a great New Year. Also, everything is delicious, except the gefilte fish. That’s definitely an acquired taste. On to the news.

STORY OF THE WEEK (5 min. read)
What: The Umbrella Revolution Might Be Putting Its Umbrellas Away
Why: Because apparently politeness towards antagonizers goes a long way to making a protest successful.

ECONOMIC THING OF THE WEEK (15 min. read)
What: It’s Way More Likely You’ll Pull Yourself Down By Your Own Bootstraps Than Up. Just Ask For Help.
Why: Because no one has ever actually been “self made,” regardless of how much they think they have been.

ADVERTISING THING OF THE WEEK (5 min. watch)
What: An Advertisement About Nothing
Why: Because Jerry Seinfeld rips the industry a new one.

SCIENCE THING OF THE WEEK (10 min. read)
What: Hopefully It Will Be Cheaper Than Moving To San Francisco
Why: Because Elon Musk didn’t build a rocket just to get people to space.

SPORTS THING OF THE WEEK (5 min. look)
What: Playoff Beards
Why: Because GO GIANTS!

TV THING OF THE WEEK (2 min. watch)
What: Strangest Simpsons Gag Of All Time
Why: Because even though the Simpsons is now whoring itself out to Family Guy, it still has the ability to do interesting things.

MUSIC THING OF THE WEEK (5 min. read)
What: Lauren Hill Doesn’t Owe You Anything
Why: Because Talib Kweli raises the bigger issue of what it means to be a fan of anything, especially when that thing does not necessarily meet expectations.

FOOD THING OF THE WEEK (5 min. read)
What: Octopus Is Delicious
Why: Because smart things can be food too.

FASHION THING OF THE WEEK (4 min. read)
What: Dude Looks Like A Lady
Why: Because the idea of John Hodgman in a dress is hilarious.

VIDEO GAME THING OF THE WEEK (4 min. watch)
What: Truth Hurts Sometimes
Why: Because I truthfully cannot stop playing it.

INTERNET THINGS OF THE WEEK (∞)
What: Best Lightbulb Commercial Ever; #1 JAMZ
Why: Because Internet.

THING YOU SHOULD GET BRIAN OF THE WEEK
What: Trip To Singapore
Why: Because Brian deserves it.

Webtacularly yours,
Brian
Managing Editor, Webtacular World
The Internet You Didn’t Know You Needed™